15 September
Who knew bingo could be this fun, darlings? Comedian Tracey Collins, AKA Audrey Heartburn for the night, works through this two-hour romp with her self-belief turned to the max and a five-star ability to work a room. Collins is a human dynamo, as happy to turn the laughs on herself as much as her audience while she pumps up the mood singing disco banger after disco banger. There’s no going back now, we’re all on her cruise ship to bingo mayhem. We’ve been told there are prizes and we’re hooked.
It’s a disarmingly simple format. As Audrey Heartburn Collins presents a grotesque pastiche of the iconic lead in the film Breakfast at Tiffany’s in a blend of stand-up and Victorian Music Hall. Sporting a tight black dress, bedecked by multiple strings of beads and what looked like a hen-night tiara, Collins’ ironic twists on Hepburn’s poise and style were hilarious when applied to the calling of numbers in a bingo game and flirting with her audience.
While sound engineer Tom had the Tobacco Factory woofers and tweeters throbbing and popping to the likes of Wham, Tom Jones or Dolly Parton, Heartburn seemed irresistibly drawn to express herself in deliriously overt dance moves. She had such an effect that any lingering reticence in the audience was effectively blown away by the exuberant madness taking place before it.
Then the music would become subdued and the business of the night would begin … “twenty-four – pelvic floor”; “I got plenty at twenty” etc, etc. Heartburn wasn’t shy of an innuendo. We all had our bingo sheets and fervently crossed off our numbers with magic markers as Audrey turned her ‘cage of balls’ to determine the next digit. Beside her stood the prize table on which we could see such desirables as a fluffy toilet seat cover, cat slippers, and a brightly coloured cushion emblazoned with the word LOVE. What was not to like?
As winners began to materialise they were invited down to take audience accolades, and with the finale one lucky punter was adorned with a multi-coloured ‘love robe’ before the entire audience was led by Heartburn in a conga dance around the auditorium to the strains of Common People by Pulp. The prizes had been awarded, the laughing and singalongs were finally done. Back performing tonight as Elvis Lesley, Collins’ enthusiastic nonsense is the perfect antidote to the dysfunctional world in which we live.
★★★★☆ Simon Bishop, 16 September 2023
Photo credit: Clive Holland
